On Saturday I went to a poolee function with the Marines, at the advice of Sgt. Huge! And Sgt. PR-German, they advised me there was going to be a Major there, the only Active duty Major in the Marine Corps who was born and raised in Puerto Rico (Guayama to be exact - this is a city at the south of the Island, for those of you who aren’t familiar with it), he was going to come home and see how his fellow Puerto Ricans were doing with their training. I got nervous of course, this is a Major we’re talking about here, he’s not only a high ranking officer, he’s the only active duty Puerto Rican officer of the Marine Corps, HE IS VERY DEMANDING, and with good reason.
So, Saturday morning, I wake up, with the “Hung up” song by Madonna, for some reason it’s in my dream and I’m with it for the entire day. I get to the function and there’s tons of kids there, there was one girl there, she had the official “poolee t-shirt“,(a blue shirt that’s a poly-blend, has the Eagle, Globe and Anchor also known as the EGA, in the front left side of the shirt, right above your pectoral area, in the back it reads in red capital letters MARINES) I had the gray “applicant t-shirt” that aptly says “Pain is weakness leaving the body” and a faded EGA on the front left side, (I love this shirt btw). For some time there we are the only two girls, among all those Amazonian boys that are “sounding off” at about 6:30am in the basement of a mall in Puerto Rico. At 7am, three more girls show up, and I’m happy, I’m not going to be one of two, I’m going to be one of 5 there.
The females ranging from ages 17 to 23 are there, they are all talking about college and how they’re not too sure if they want to stop going to college to enlist or finish and so on. The youngest one has all the confidence in the world, one of those kids who say they do this and that and the second and the third, but when it comes down to performance level they fall short. Yeah, she was one of those. So, after filling out some paperwork and me making some jokes about the paperwork (it was a waiver of responsibility that was signed, lifting the Marine Corps of any injury that I would attain, should it happen, when I was running around Ft. Buchannan, I joked and said to Sgt. PR-German “but it’s your fault I’ll be running!”) we waited, and waited, for Sgt. Toughguy to finish talking about what he found online, something about some Airmen saying their Basic Training was more intense than that of the Marine Corps, and how the video was sent to be taken down by their C.O. at the Pentagon (I actually thing this story was funny, but really long) we headed out to Ft. Buchanan, where we were greeted with looks of “WTF?” by a group of Navy sailors who were practicing their own PT session. As soon as we hit the deck (floor, ground) we got into formation and began the formal PT session that is done every second Saturday of the month, this time with more resilience, since the Major was there and we wanted to impress.
So, we all fell into formation and I was in the back, being an applicant among poolees meant I was to fall behind the poolees and not with them, they have a higher “ranking” with the Corps than I do. I fell behind them in a straight line along with all the other girls, who were standing to my left and right. They looked over at me to see how they should stand and held their shoulders back to emulate the perfect form of a Marine, something I learned by looking at the pictures and by my father teaching me.
We begin our work outs after the former greetings, first off, is pull ups for the boys, dead hang for the girls, minimum requirement for the girls to stay hanging there is 12seconds. I’m on the back of a line that has about 5 boys, all the girls are pulled to one line by Gunny. Awesomeness and we are taken to the lower pull up bar, so it would be easier for us to just climb up there, since all the females present seem to be vertically challenged. First one up, second, third, Me, fourth, fifth, sixth. They all hung on for as long as they could. Some complained they were tired from working the night before, all I really cared was how I hung on to dear life and concentrated on my breath, it worked, I stood there for 26 seconds, before loosing grip at a comment that flew by my mind. That’s 10 seconds longer than the last time.
Next up: crunches, Marine Corps style!!!! Ok, so all the females are together, again, since we even ourselves out we are to hold each others legs for this part. We begin, I am holding a girls legs, I’m supposed to sit on her feet to make sure she’s doesn’t use her feet to support her crunches, but since this girl seems to be as heavy as one of my legs I didn’t think it was fair for me to plant my significantly larger ass on her feet. So, I’m sitting on the ground, my legs are around her and I have to hold her knees with my arms, wrapping my arms underneath her knees, again, to prevent support. “10 seconds!!! 10, 9, 8, 7, 6, 5, 4, 3, 2, 1, GO!!!” she starts, I count, I tell her to breath, tell her to keep on going, we have Sgt.’s coming around us making sure our forms are perfect, that we’re not “cheating” they make sure she’s not lifting her arms from her torso as she does her crunches, she’s fine, they leave, they come around again, she’s tired, it’s 50 for her, I tell her to keep on going the 10 second mark has been sounded off, she continues, I can see the pain in her face, she’s getting sloppy, I tell her, keep on going, keep on going, she does, she reaches 53, she did good. It’s my turn, I tell her to sit on my legs, I bring my feet close to my bottom, I tell her how to hold my legs, she follows directions nicely, again “10 SECONDS” the countdown begins, here I am, breathing, “GO!!!” I go off, with a bang, 1, 2, and I keep on going, I hear the girl next to me counting, and I can’t let her go a higher number than me, damned it, I’ve been doing P90X I should kick ass, I keep on going, the Sgt.’s come by, they see my form, they don’t correct me, they go away, I keep on crunching, the girl is counting, she’s amazed at me, looking at me as if I were a machine, I keep going, then I start feeling it, I made the mistake of laying flat on the ground, my stomach stretched completely and there it was, the sting of crunches hitting me right where it’s supposed to, then I hear it, the 10 second remaining sound off, an Sgt. Comes over “YOU REST WHEN YOU DIE!!!!” I pull up, there it was the second wind, 1, 2, 3 “STOP!!!!!” my total 73 crunches, good stuff.
Then it’s the running, we were ordered to go into formation once more, not breaking it to slowly jog toward the start line. Slowly we went there, Cadencing our way to the start line and I was in the back with my fellow cruncher “Tinkerbell” she didn’t know what was going on so she followed my lead, I would very quietly explain to her what was going on. We reached the start line, Gunny Awesomeness ordered all the girls to come to the front and the boys to go in the back, there it was, all six girls in the front, since we were so tiny, we had to be in the front, to prevent us from being run over, it didn’t really work, since I almost got run over anyway by some Amazonian boys anyway. The mark, set go! We start off good, the taller boys go off, running and running with their long legs, and there they are, off! I am here, pacing, waiting for me to just really warm up, the hot sun is beaming on my face, and this shirt, that’s 100% cotton is making me feel like I’m boiling, boiling, I didn’t know a shirt could be so heavy! Anyway, all of a sudden, I hear it, “time goes by, so slowly” in my head, I start signing, I had left two girls behind, or so I thought, and they caught up with me, they’re panting, I’m breathing normally, I tell them to concentrate on their breath, “you can do it” “let’s go, let’s go, let’s go” I start signing, they’re motivated, we get to the check point where Sgt. Huge! Is standing with his stop watch “6:30!” he sounds off, and I say in my mind, “what?!!” right before I start hauling ass to the finish line, I run around him and leave the girls behind, I see Sgt. Toughguy screaming at two of his recruits “THERE’S A GIRL THAT’S COMING RIGHT BEHIND YOU, DON’T LET HER PASS YOU, DON’T LET HER PASS YOU!!!!” ha! I passed him, he was eating my DUST! Ha! Then I approach another boy, he’s a little chunky, and he’s jog-walking, the Major is right in front of him, there is, looking at him and running backwards telling the boy “if you want to be a Marine you have to impress me and you’re NOT doing that right now” I hauled ass harder, leaving the boy and the Major to eat my dust too, then I really start feeling it in my feet, the toes, they’re curling in my shoes, I lose the grip, the sun is hotter, telling me “hey was sup???!!” as it’s smacking the crap out of my face, I pant, I sweat, and I see another chunky boy up ahead, I pass him, he gets upset, later on, up the hill, he passes me, I pass him again, then I get to the finish line “14:14!” He and I make the same time. I scream out “I need some water!” a boy hands over his unfinished water bottle before I hit someone in the face for it, he smiles as I thank him, then I turn around the Major was right there “GOOD EFFORT!!” and gave me a high five A HIGH FIVE!!! Then I realized, I was the first girl to pass the finish line, yep, I was the first girl to pass the finish line and I’m the oldest one there, how hot is that!?
Cadencing: “UP IN THE MORNING WITH THE PUERTO RICO SUN, GONNA RUN ALL DAY ‘TILL THE RUNNING’S DONE! MY CORPS, YOUR CORPS, THE MARINE CORPS! OOH-RAH”